THIS IS MY FIGHT SONG

I hate exercise. I need to make that abundantly clear. But apparently it is a necessary evil. Every once in awhile though, that despised thing called exercise gives me a jolt. Today was one of those days.

I try to take a walk on Saturday mornings. Today was chilly so I bundled up in my hat, scarf, gloves, and sweatshirt. I’ve been listening to Tony Robbins at the gym during the week but today I decided I needed my good ol’ exercise music playlist. So I started off. Two songs in and my current favorite song came on. I liked the song the first time I heard it, but when I learned the story of it, my like turned to love turned to favorite.

Singer/songwriter Rachel Platten was frustrated and discouraged. She’d tried for years to make it in the music business but was getting nowhere. So with the help of a friend, she wrote a song for herself, to give herself the courage to keep going, her anthem. She said, “…through writing the song, I made the decision to not listen to that small mean voice that was telling me I wasn‘t good enough. I decided to keep believing in myself no matter what.” It wasn’t initially written to be produced, merely to encourage her to keep going, but with the encouragement of her publisher and the inability to get a producer, she learned how to produce it herself.

Like a small boat
On the ocean
Sending big waves
Into motion
Like how a single word
Can make a heart open
I might only have one match
But I can make an explosion

And all those things I didn’t say
Wrecking balls inside my brain
I will scream them loud tonight
Can you hear my voice this time?

This is my fight song
Take back my life song
Prove I’m alright song
My power’s turned on
Starting right now I’ll be strong
I’ll play my fight song
And I don’t really care if nobody else believes
‘Cause I’ve still got a lot of fight left in me

Losing friends and I’m chasing sleep
Everybody’s worried about me
In too deep
Say I’m in too deep (in too deep)
And it’s been two years I miss my home
But there’s a fire burning in my bones
Still believe
Yeah, I still believe

And all those things I didn’t say
Wrecking balls inside my brain
I will scream them loud tonight
Can you hear my voice this time?

Like a small boat
On the ocean
Sending big waves
Into motion
Like how a single word
Can make a heart open
I might only have one match
But I can make an explosion

My recent trip to Indonesia with my brother and his girlfriend changed something in me. There is so much life to be lived! And I have the power to make my life be whatever I want it to be. Travel liberates me. It makes me feel alive. If I could have my dream, it would be to live in different places around the world for a year at a time.

So why not? I’ve spent the majority of the last several years trying to “get over” my divorce and “get past” my cancer. When I finished my book, “Carry On and Ditch the Excess Baggage,” I knew there was more story left to tell. It just hadn’t been created yet. At that point, I still had no direction and frankly no energy to create. Indonesia lit a fire….and that little fire in me just might be ready to create something.

When my song came on today, something crazy happened. I started to jog. I realized that the beat of the song was in sync with the pace I could jog. As my feet hit the pavement to the beat of my song, I felt a little tingle. I looked around at the beautiful Monterey Bay to my left….and I smiled. I smiled while jogging! That is absolutely unheard of in my world!

With the smile came a bit of the energy I felt in Indonesia, the fire that ignited in me that made me believe that no matter how old I am, how rich or poor I am, no matter what my current skill set is, I am still in control of what my life looks like, and I can still create change.

What steps would need to happen for me to live in a different place every year? I can make a list. I can make a plan. Maybe the plan will work and maybe it won’t. But how will I ever know if I don’t try? Being in Indonesia made me feel brave. It made me feel like anything is possible. It’s time to maybe add a little crazy to my plan and see where that takes me.

So…..

This is my fight song, take back my life song….
….My power’s turned on, starting right now I’ll be strong….
And I don’t really care if nobody else believes
‘Cause I’ve still got a lot of fight left in me
Know I’ve still got a lot of fight left in me

Tiffany Allen

THIS IS MY FIGHT SONG

Carry On and Ditch the Excess Baggage!